Tuesday 03/15/11

Down another pound this morning! 195.8

If I can keep the scale moving like this, I'll be happy! I'm happy now, but I should say that I'll stay happy. Lol.

I didn't do much at all during the day today. In fact, any time I had a down moment from the kids, I was trying to get my computer to run better and running scans. Ever since I hooked up my external hard drive last night, and also started messing with iTunes, my computer has been throwing a hissy fit. I think I finally have it back to "normal". Lol.

I spent two hours at the gym tonight. I didn't get there as early as I would have preferred to because my husband got home from work late this evening. I did 20 minutes of walking and jogging before working out with the trainer for an hour. My trainer and I had some choice words...ok I had some choice words for him at one point. I know I'm paying him to push me beyond what I would do on my own. I get this. But what he sometime fails to remember is that I have injuries to work around: weak shoulder (tore my rotator cuff about 2-1/2 years ago and it's still weak), recovering still from my broken tailbone, bad hip joints and bad knees. In fact I dislocated one of my knees twice in one week when I was about 7 or 8 months pregnant with my son. I dislocated it again today. It hurts like a SOB when it does, and thankfully it (so far has) always pops back into place when I straighten my leg. But it does leave my knee weaker and aching. (If you're wondering how I dislocated it, I was just sitting on the floor and went to get up. Yup that simple.) So my knee was weaker tonight and my trainer was pushing me. He seemed to forget that I had hurt myself today and wasn't just "wimping out". No hard feelings between me and him though despite that. He joked about hoping my husband doesn't ever piss me off. Lol.

So anyways, I got sidetracked. I spent two hours at the gym. Twenty minutes of walking/jogging before working out with Jeff (my trainer). An hour of working my butt off with him. Another 5-10 minutes of walking followed by 35 minutes on the elliptical. I kicked butt tonight. I'll be paying for it tomorrow. Lol.

Monday 03/14/11

196.8 today and 197.4 on Sunday.

So I have feel like I have a lot on my mind to put today, so I'm going to try to get it all out without it coming out in one big jumbled mess. Wish me luck!

I'm still losing and that's great! Yay! I still haven't gotten around to my "reward" for getting (and staying) under 200 pounds yet. (If you don't know, or have forgotten, it was to get a much needed haircut.) I am planning on doing that Wednesday evening. I am so ready to have my hair cut. It's too long for me, and it will help me to feel better about myself.

In just shy of two months, I've lost 10.2 pounds. I'm happy with that. It's not a fast loss, but it's still a loss and that's a plus. I'm averaging about 1-1/2 pound loss per week. If I stay at this rate, I'll reach MY goal in about 10 months. I say MY goal because according to certain sites, my goal should be about 13 pounds less than what I've set my goal to be. Honestly that weight (137 lbs.) is a number I really don't ever expect to see. The last time I was that light was right before and right after I had my first child (I was 131 lbs. then) and I think I looked too thin and unhealthy. My goal is to be around 150 lbs. and whatever weight I actually settle on I'll be okay with.

Workout clothes for me are so hard to find. I'm so picky about how things feel and the "weight" and "breathability" (is that even a word? off to Google that. According to Merriam-Webster, no, it's not a word.) of fabric. I am also unfortunately well endowed and that poses a whole different issue when it comes to clothing much less workout clothes. I have yet to find a sports bra that can hold up to the job it's put to. I currently wear two sports bras layered just to get enough support for day to day, but it falls short for the support needed for working out. I have some great workout pants from Target, but the weather is starting to get warmer and I need to find capris now. I get hot very easily and need to cut out any fabric I can or else I'll burn up. I have a couple of men's v-neck undershirts (gray in color) that I wear to workout that are a great weight and are a nice breathable fabric. I wish I could find more in a color other than gray or white. I'm sure everyone at the gym thinks that I wear the same thing every day I go. Lol. I wore a different t-shirt last Thursday when I went to the gym and I absolutely burned up the whole time. I really thought it was a lighter weight and breathable fabric. I guess not though. Workout wear is crucial. Still looking for the optimal sports bra and shirts to wear.

I've been eating my Nutrisystem foods off an on lately. Some aren't bad. Some are just plain awful and disgusting (those I don't tend to eat). No worse than any other meal replacement foods, diet meals or shelf stable meals you'd pick up at the store. I'm debating on if it's worth it or not to get another five weeks worth of food once I'm low on this order. I do like a lot of the treats and breakfast items. For the lunches and dinners they all seem to suck so far expcept for the meal bars and the thick crust pizzas. I still have plenty of time to decide though. Having the Nutrisystem foods on hand has helped me to eat more and bring my calorie intake up to a more normal level. I did pick up a bunch of meal replacement bars when I was at the grocery store the other day to add to my intake on days that I'm running low on calories. I'll just have to see how I do from here on out.

I'm still having some family/financial woes going on that are affecting things but I'm not letting them affect my eating or exercise. I went to the gym Saturday afternoon and did a round of cardio. Nothing much, but cardio none the less. I had planned to go again Sunday morning, but I didn't make it there because we had a rough night with our son Saturday night. (He's at the age where he's freaking out at night time and doesn't want to go to sleep in his room and if he wakes up at night he won't go back to sleep in his room.) We didn't get a good night's sleep, and we had lots to do so I didn't go to the gym. Oh well, I tried. Life gets in the way occasionally, but I'm not going to let it bring me down. I didn't fit in any exercise today, but I'm not stressing that either. Tomorrow's another gym night with the trainer.

My workout plan for the rest of the week is as follows: Tuesday I'll be in the gym with the trainer for an hour and I plan to get in 30-45 minutes of cardio on top of this. Wednesday I can't make it to the gym, so I'm going to try to fit in about 60 minutes of light cardio at home. Thursday I'll be in the gym again with the trainer for an hour and also 30-45 minutes of cardio. Friday I'm going to try to workout at the gym, but since I'm going to have to take my kids with me, I don't know if I'm going to get much in. I'm going to do as much cardio as I can get in before my son gets too cranky being in the child watch center. Saturday morning I'm going to try to go to the gym for 45-60 minutes of cardio and the same for Sunday. Wish me luck!

197.8 today, 197.2 yesterday and 196.6 on Thursday.

So I've lost some weight so far and thankfully I'm still losing, albeit slowly. I'll take a slow loss over no loss though. They say the poorer your habits are before starting to lose weight, the faster you'll lose it in the beginning. Well obviously my poor habits weren't really as bad as I thought they were, since I'm eating well and my weight's coming off slowly. I'm still struggling to get in enough calories per day, it's still too low on most days. I'm eating and I'm not hungry, but I'm just not taking in enough calories per day. I'm really working on this, but it's hard. Funny to hear a fat overweight person talk about not eating enough. So many people assume that you're heavy because you eat too much and make unhealthy choices of what to eat. That's not always the case.

Now don't get me wrong, I have been known to eat poorly. I still do. But for the most part, I really don't make the really unhealthy choices for things to eat when I go bad. Just somewhere in the middle really. I do make the really bad choices occasionally though. I won't deny that. It's just not the norm for me. I'm really struggling to eat enough. It's hard. I've been told I should start eating some nuts to bring my calories up without taking in a bulk of food. Even doing that is hard for me, but I think I'll buy some unsalted almonds and other nuts when I go grocery shopping soon.

Thursday I went to the gym, and I did 30 minutes of cardio on the elliptical followed by an hour with our trainer. I felt like my ass was kicked big time on Thursday night, from the cardio all the way to the training. I managed to get in an hour of walking on my treadmill at home yesterday and also twenty minutes on my exercise bike. Nothing heavy duty, but cardio none the less. I'm waiting for my husband to get home from work so that I can go to the gym and get in 30-60 minutes of cardio today. I was losing my motivation because the scale wasn't moving at all but now that I've seen that it can and will move again, I'm motivated again. Funny how that works. If I can help it, I'll do cardio today and tomorrow at the gym.

198.8 today and 198.4 yesterday.

I'm still eating well. I've had a slight splurge here and there, but not very often. I'm still eating too few calories on most days. I really have a hard time getting it up around the 1700 calorie intake range that I need it to be. Today I only made it to about 1200-1300 which is not a lot. I really need to work on getting it around 1500-1700 per day. I'm doing much better on my fluid intake though.

I went to the gym last night, but all I did was walk on the indoor track. I did, however, walk for an hour. I would have hopped on the elliptical, but the gym was really busy last night, and they stayed busy. I didn't do any exercise today, but will be in the gym again tomorrow evening.

198.0 today and yesterday. 197.8 on Saturday.

As you can see my weight is at a standstill. I'm not losing, but I'm not gaining. I'm not eating and drinking enough on a daily basis. My fluid intake has dropped drastically, and I'm working on that. I haven't been actually counting calories, just kind of guessing. Well I'm not taking in enough calories on a daily basis, so I'm not losing. I'm working on that as of today.

Still realing from the financial blow that came our way, so my mind isn't fully in it right now. I haven't been exercising since I was at the gym on Thursday. I'm definitely going to shoot for more movement this week. I have some Redbox movies to return later on today, and instead of driving to the closest one I'm going to take the kids and walk there. Every bit counts.

197.8 today and 199.2 yesterday.

Depressed. Big time. That's my mood right now. Long story short and without naming names, my husband and I had a major financial blow hit us last night at the hands of some family members. There's not a whole lot we can do about it but hope and pray that this won't cause us to lose everything we have worked so hard for. We came up with a game plan, and we're hoping we can do what we need to do in the short amount of time and with the low funds we have to pull it off. I don't see any way for it to be done, but we don't have a choice since we've been thrown under the bus. Or at least that's how I feel. The others involved have their own issues and reasons, but that doesn't change how it affects my husband, myself and our children. I'm worried. So is my husband. We both felt absolutely sick to our stomachs last night with stress. I was barely able to eat dinner, and my husband never did. We stayed up late talking and brainstorming.

Moving on now. My eating has been on track, but I'm not taking in enough water/fluids per day. I have a hard time remembering that with my son and my niece around. I'm too busy trying to keep my drink away from my son, so often it's in the kitchen somewhere out of sight. The little guy loves to drink mommy, daddy and sissy's drinks so we have to keep them out of his reach and often out of his sight also. Keeping it out of his sight, means it's out of my sight. And out of sight, out of mind. At least for me that's how it works most of the time.

I made it to the gym again last night. Worked on on the elliptical for about 40 minutes and with the trainer for about 40 minutes. My legs hurt today. Actually they hurt last night before I even left the gym. I worked some muscles that I guess I don't normally work. I was supposed to go to the gym tomorrow morning with my sister, but looks like she's going to a movie instead. I'll still go by myself because I have a plan, desire and need to get in exercise when I can.

199.2 yesterday and today.

So I had lots on my mind until I actually sat down to write this. Now I'm just drawing a big blank, so forgive me if I ramble more than usual.

Yesterday I did make it to the gym, and I hated every minute up until I got there and up until I left to come home. I have problems with my hips, and they have gotten quite bad lately. The past several days have been beyond horrible. I hurt last night and therefore I walked really really slowly around the indoor track for my "warm up". I normally would do a few laps around that to loosen everything up and then hop onto an elliptical to get some decent cardio in. That was not going to happen last night. I was lucky to do some walking and then the weight machines that the trainer wanted us to do. I gladly walked out the door once the hour session was over. No exercise today, but I'll be back at the gym again tomorrow. I plan to hop on the elliptical tomorrow for a spell.

My eating has been pretty good overall, just eating more. Not too much more though. Yesterday I had a meal replacement shake for breakfast. Lunch was a tuna sandwich and three small apples. I had a string cheese before heading to the gym. Dinner was some turkey meatballs served with spaghetti squash. Or at least that's how I ate it. The hubs and the little guy had theirs with spaghetti noodles. The daughter had hers as a meatball sub. Dessert was a Skinny Cow cookies & cream ice cream sandwich.

Today I had a double portion of cereal for breakfast with 8 ounces of fat-free milk. (The daughter told me tonight that she doesn't mind the fat-free milk...I normally buy 1% for the family, but didn't this time because all of the expirations were too soon.) Lunch was a turkey meatball sub. I had an afternoon snack of Special K cracker chips and a chocolate peanut bar (130 calories). Dinner was a salad and Digiorno stuffed crust pizza (the daughter's request again) with some spicy Ranch dressing. Dessert will be another Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich.

I still don't feel motivated. In fact, I feel like mush. I feel like I could just bond with the couch and be happy. Not a good place to be mentally when it comes to being active. Granted I'm not just bonding with the couch because I have kids and a husband and lots of things to do on a daily basis. I just feel like I could.

I added another tab at the top of the blog with links to other blogs that I find helpful. I'll update it any time I think of another one that is or has been helpful.